012 ♐ Video ♐ I sit and spew my guts out to the open air 'cause no one wants to hear a drunken fool

[codename_duchess]

[For a split second there is darkness, and a muffled "Shit, hold on - hold on, I got it" in Archer’s voice. When he gets his hand off the camera and holds the communicator up properly he’s in his natural state (drunk), behaving normally (drinking), leaning up against a chair propping up Gary’s feet.] Hey Barge, help us out with something.

[Gary is draped over both of the chairs in Archer’s room and endeavoring to take up as much space as is humanly possible. He flips the camera a lazy salute. He is also drunk. His sunglasses are on his head. It’s a party.] We wanted to know, what are some things you’ve done? Or haven’t done? What- what are the things -

[He trails off into giggling. Archer guffaws, raising a tall glass filled with a thick pale green substance in a toast.] Mmmm. So. - Yeah, anyway, we’re playing a game. And we’re going for the record, right, buddy?

I’ve no fucking idea, [Gary replies, grinning like an idiot and finishing off his own glass.]

Jesus Christ, really? We’ve been playing this for - holy shit, four hours and eight minutes. Do you seriously think anyone’s ever played Never Have I Ever for this long before? [Archer pauses thoughtfully.] Have any of you ever played Never Have I Ever for four hours and eight minutes? [He anticipates a no, raising his Green Russian expectantly.] We’re kinda running out of questions.

[Gary reaches down to swat at Archer’s shoulder to get his attention.] Oh, waitwaitwait. Never have I ever kept a Never Have I Ever game going this long!

Except you totally have now! [Archer greets this with a cheer, punching the air as he drains down the rest of the drink in one go.]

[OOC: Truth flood joint post with this_corrosion! Both Gary and Archer are affected. Replies may come from either or both of them.]

Comments

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

That's what I had to do with Katya, and it's not fair. At all. I don't want to again.

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

No, it's not fair. And startin' over always sucks, but sometimes it's for the best. Figure out who ya are and what ya actually want for yerself without someone else. There's always a chance that the timin's just not right for ya, and down the road you'll fit better.

[Well, she's not talking from personal experience at all. Nope. Cookies.]

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

...and how do you figure that out?

[This, too, is new for him. His life has been spent working around and catering to his mother's whims and commands. There haven't been too many major decisions that were his own.]

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

When Ah do it, Ah'll let ya know.

So far, for me, it's been being alone for a while, then gettin' into a silly, fun, casual thing with an adorable, stupidly brave guy, and neither of us have any illusions about it bein' permanent or long term. We're just...havin' fun.

[She's smiling, a little wistfully, a little baffled. Dean's been good for her. She hopes she's been good for him in return.]

Maybe try that, instead of one night stands. Morgana seems fun.

[She gives Archer's leg a little nudge. She is a fan of Morgana, in that the lady demands more out of Archer in terms of behavior. He's nice to Morgana. It's kind of a big deal.]

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

Okay, but... even if Morgana wants to do that, she's not going to be there when I go home. And if Lana doesn't want me, what then? Katya ran off with Barry the mechanical penis. Do I just bang Pam until I die?

I mean no offense to Pam, but. I don't love her.

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

Then ya don't worry about it. Like Ah said, be alone for awhile. There's no shame in it. You're more than the half of a couple, Sterling.

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

I know that!

And I'm usually alone. Except for Woodhouse and the lemur. And the prostitutes.

And one of those people count.

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

How d'ya feel about Woodhouse?

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

Aw, Woodhouse isn't even a real person.

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

[At that, Rogue gives him a quick flick between the eyes.]

That is unacceptable, Sterling.

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

Hey!

He isn't! He's a freaking house-elf in human skin!

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

[Another flick. This'll keep happening until you stop saying insensitive shit about Woodhouse, Archer.]

He's a person. This is a great example of somethin' about ya that turns people off. That man raised ya, gave his whole life t'ya, and deserves respect for that.

[spam for Rogue] cw drug abuse

[codename_duchess]

Because he got paid to! And what did he do, anyway? The day I turned six, Mother was in Guatemala and Woodhouse celebrated by shooting up in the bathroom! Jesus Christ, it's not like the guy deserves a freaking medal!

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

Does yer mother just ruin every life she touches? Is that her hobby?

[Because this is clearly Malory's fault.]

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

Of course she doe-

...holy shit. She does.

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

[The answer is no surprise to Rogue. She's steadily developed a hate for Malory Archer over the past months.]

Ah'm seriously gonna punch that woman in the face some day. She needs takin' down a peg or fifty.

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

Shit, don't do that! You could kill her! That's how Bilbo the Hobbit enthusiast died!

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

[The flattest look.]

She's not gonna die from getting punched in the face.

[spam for Rogue]

[codename_duchess]

Bilbo did and he was like half her age!

Granted, he was morbidly obese. But she drinks a lot, so it should even out. [...like he can talk.]

[spam for Rogue]

[la_belle_rogue]

She's an ex-spy, Archer. She can take a punch.

[No matter how you protest, Malory is going to get punched in the face.]